Tails' Third Tail
by stopthememe
Summary: Tails moves to a nudest cologne and hijinx ensue when he meets his mysterious neighbor.
1. Chapter 1

this was a new experience for tails. he moved into a nudest cologne and was shy and scard. he was putting boxs away when he herd a knock at the door. when he opened the, door WHAMMO! DICK ALERT. He could not stop staring at the handsome blue pickle that had entered his home. "hey. . ." the blue beast said, "im sonic elizabeth the hedgehog." "n-nice. . to meet you." tails said shyly. it was his first time seeing a naked man other than himself, but he was a boy. he never knew the sensation he was experiencing down. . .there before. Sonic was not wearing any shoes or gloves. His fur nipples were sweet but his soul was dark, if they were together tails would give him the nickname " _ **dark chocolate daddy**_."

"so I heard ur new around here" sonic said in a sultre sweet caramel dark chocolate rolo voice, "ive seen you on christian before, havent i? too bad you can't wink at other boys on there ; ) " "Um- I don't know if I'll stay here. It's kinda.. awkward isn't it?" Tails said as he looked down at senpais blueberry love rocket. "ull get used to it" Sonic said. "Come in w-w-why don't you" Tails said shyly. "Id be RIGHHT HAPPY TO heh heh heh" Sonic said. then sanic fell down the stairs and accidently fell with his mouth on tailss extra tail. "oh shit im sorry" sonic got up and licked his mouth to clean his face. "sorry for what" tails said.  
Sonic could feel his sky scraper dong rise and his face was as red as Italy's tomatoes but he tried to contain himself, he was strong man after all. "tails please suck ym dong" sonic was _**fast**_ about this, he slam dunked tails into the bed and took his clothes off. wait this was a nudest cologne, they didnt have clothes, but sonic took them off anyways. sonic rubbed his fingers through tailss deep forest of fur to look for the nips he couldnt find them. sonic put his little man onto tailss supposed stomach. he put his terriyaki chicken bites into tailss bellybutton. tails screamed. But in a child who dropped icecream on the floor during a hot day way. Sonic knew he wanted it, that is what shota's (like armin if he wasnt a girl) XD do after all. Sonic looks for the butt but cant find it. Does Tails have a butt? Does he have body parts? Sonic started to think in a yaoi way. he frustratedly started looking between the tails, even the "special" one. "i like your fingernails! where did you get them did?" sonic said while he slapped tailss pickle around and batted it like a cat. tails was too busy being a little bitch to answer. "My ocinchin!" tails shouted, but it was as if no one could hear him and he was living in the void because sonic kept kicking his meat stick. "MY KINK" shouted Tails. Then tails flipped him cuz he was the ichiban fighter in Japan. "I will dominate you" tails said as he turned as dark as his soul and his eyes glowed red like _**vagoogle**_ blood. Tails revealed the truth, he was the yaoi master and no one could conrol his bara noodle. He didnt have a booty because he doesnt live that life. Sonic didnt no what to do- he'd never experienced- this… before. Sonic's eyes cried icy limped tears. He actually enjoyed it- but this wasnt him… tails licked his toe. He bit off his toe.

sonic decided that he NEEDED to make a butthole for himself. he thrust his unique finger into where tails butthole should be. "ouch wtf" tails seductively moaned. "you are sexy like potao" sonic grunted.

"Potatos can get holes right? I thitnk you could be my potato, tails-chan." Then sonic shoved his entire fist into tails empty flesh, it was hard because he didn't have his super massive black hole by muse cool guy gloves he probably got from his motorcycling uncle for christmas. But he did it and he was proud of himself and he highfived tail's new butt in congradulations. just then sonic's dick was so proud that it shot confetti in congradulertitatations. "i think your robert downey jr. is broken is it supposed to be bleeding mayo?"


	2. Chapter 2

a tall, redheaded stranger knocked on sonic's door. sonic opened the door to reveal a tall, redheaded stranger with toned muscles, big workers' hands, and a cheeseled jaw. it was sebastian the crab. fuck him. sonic closed the door. also knuckles was somehow on sonic's couch. "hey," knuckies said, "can i borrow your lasagna?" tails limped across the livingroom and headed for the dooooooor. "thanks for the sex. . . _**BYE**_ _!_ " tails said but he turned and saw a big hunk ol' meat sitting right there on the couch right next to knuckies. also knuckies was there. he saw knuckies's four headed monster of a doinker and gasped in horror. trails fucking exploded. u will not be mised. anyway the lasagna. sonic got the piping hot, cool, refreshing, herbal green tea lasagna out of the stove with oven mitts and placed the fucking hot pan on knuckle's chode. Knuckie's meter long king-kong caught on fire, like the firey lust in hus heart. He knew this day would come, he let out a dark chordle, he would use his Wriggling Meat Stick to set fire to sanic. He angryily placed his four headed mini man in the flaming lasaga while shouting "U THINK THIS IS A JOKE?!1 I AM GONA _gently caress_ YOU." He then held sonic like the baby that he is. "dad" sonic said. "what son?" sonic's dad said; he was sitting on the couch. before sonic could say anything knuckies pinned him on the bed that was somehow by the couch by sonic's dad _**like a boss**_ _._ and then he vishusly madeout with sonic _**like a boss**_ _._ then he spread lotion all over sonic _**like a boss**_ _._ then he tucked sonic into bed and read him a story _**like a boss**_ _._ then he backflipped onto the bed, put sonic in a headlock and made sonic scream like that bitch that exploded earlier. then they made hot honking country love. the only sounds that could be heard was knuckies and sonic moaning and sonic's dad making the usual grunty dad noises as he read the newspaper next ot them.

Sonic's butt was so hot that his dad decided to cook his morning bacon on it. "excuse me knuckies," he said as he shoved knuckies aside to cook his bacon on that fine ass. Knuckies _**respectfully**_ asked the dad to move aside, if it wasnt an inconvenience to him of course. "My. . .my father died in the vietnam war a long time ago. . . my mom couldnt sustain our house. we couldnt afford anything. . . it was hard being a boy growing up in a household of women. ive seen things. . .things far worse than what my pop would've seen in war. . but. .," sonic furthered his distant stare as he continued, "i've grown to learn things. . . i got me a job. . .paid for the house and my mom took care of the siblings that i never had. . . . i had to grow up faster than most kids. i didnt have a childhood. i just want to be a kid again." "but your dad is right there" knuckdies said. "oh lol." sonic said. "im sorry that your dad died though, i guess you need a strong paternal figure in your life, and mine are standing up right now : } ." knuckies said as he petted sonic's nose. sonic sobbed and fell asleep in knuckler's arms.


	3. Chapter 3

Or sonic _**was**_ going to sleep- until furry sakura from narudo knocked on his front door. He didnt need his mom over wtf she can wait. sonic pretends he didnt hear it so shed go away. She knocked 420 times so he decided he had to. she was in a wedding dress when sonic opened the door then he screamed and fainted, biggu dadi knux had to rescue him! from himself!.

"lulz i got mpregz with your baby, ur a big daddy sonic" **amy** said flirtily as she batted her lashes. "sonic is that true? : ( " knucklers said somberly, as he packed up his four donger doodles to hit the road. "I thought I was teh only 1 baby, you promised" black tears flooded around him making a pool of true despair. "why would i touch a vagoogle?" sonic said; he paused and waited for the laughtrack to play, but there was none.

"Lol sonic we talked about this ur bi! There's nothing wrong with that it just means we have to get married today nbd." said Amy as casually as a like on facebook.

Amy stfu you dont know true yaoi, Id never let you touch this. Sonic touched his butt and made sizzling noises.

"I cant deal homo bro" sonic said as he confusingly tossed around playing cards. Knux said "welp bya broski we had a good run" then he punched sonic in the spikes. "Im gonna join the vietnam war lol never gonna see you again sorry not sorry" "but the vietnam war has been over for years!" "I'm still going…" knucklers ollied out on his skateboard and sonic sobbed grossly into his fiery chest. amy saw that sonic was sad and she did not want her baby to inherit his sadness so she gave sonic pudding with bananas in it and another pudding with burnt marshmallows on top and sonic sadly slurped the pudding in started whispering lana del rey™ lyrics into sonic's ear. she wanted sonic to give her the cummies.


End file.
